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Sunday 14 November 2021

Will you let my world die in you

When the night turns me dark

Will you be by my side at early dawn?

Forgetting my  dark shadow, 

Will you walk with me in heat?

Your elegant, vividly colored attire 

Will it tolerate intensity of scorching heat?


I desire to own a time machine to rewind my time

Will you step into it with me to hold me tight ?

May be you may slip out  or i may grow slow

Will you still try to find me and sit beside me?


I have my hopes soaring high on you


Come dear, hold me tight

Will you Let my world die in you ?


On a shroud ,

Will you paint a rose for me?

I want you to  drop tears in red 

Will you let them flow or leave them stoic on your lashes?

It will be a moment of pain & agony, 

Will you show depth of your agony or betray with silence as usual?


Kalpana's imagination

Tuesday 26 October 2021

Everyday - A Newpage

Blank mind writes blanks

Spaces made for heart to fill up

Heart has lot to pour

In those fill in the gaps

It completes the blanks with  numerous sentences

Blanks bleed, blood flows

Sentences runs on the road

Wild, weird, furious not knowing “Where”

Panic struck! Hands shiver!! Ink cries, tears drop; scribbling!

Till the page tear

And the whole story tore 

Two hearts apart

Deleted forever


New page begins

Season changed

Spring blooms 

And the world- busy

Characters busy

Preparing themselves to be polished again

To be fitted in another set of jewellery


Kalpana Shah

Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Kalpana’s imagination

Ordeal of Saaf Safai



This name saaf safai sounds weird. It makes me reason out internally, apprehensive about what saaf they will do? Eventually I decide to give them incharge of my house.
 
Decided days dates and payment.  Early morning knock, i open and find two men with sleeveless tees and folded tracks, head tied with handkerchiefs, grinning with folded hands, “Namaste Bhabie!”
With my half sleepy eyes look at them, for a minute… dazed, numb i stare. “Bhabie! Saafsafai” ohh no! Just forgotten.  “Arey, itna Subah savere?? “ litle irritated me! He laughs, “aat baje bola na, savere ke sade aat ho gaye!” I look at a clock, grumbling inside, cursing diwali! Now no option left i let them in.  Dilemma starts here. After half an hour bhabie chai aur naasta do! Yet we have also not begun ours.  I tell them to wait for my maid. My husband, children venting out one year anger on me. “ why do you want to …. Diwali is nothing new! Stop following old parampara!! Warning them! Don’t let them touch my stuffs in case lose anything.” I tell them to wind up and keep in the cupboard. “ No. not now!! I am already late.” And they leave. 
Bhabi, “Give us 3-4 napkins, surf, and mopper. “So do I!! After half an hour, “paani chahiye” with paani and breakfast supplied i take a sigh of relief. After an hour, “ Abhie idhar aao! Humare saath khade raho! Kya kya rakhna hai aur kya nikalna?” With eyes of expectations. For two hours i am there with them. “ bhook lagi hai ! Khana khake aate hai 200/- rs do.” After an hour and half they are back. “ itne der kyun lagi?” “Humko bhi aaram toh chahiye na… kyun nahin karna aaram?” “Theek hai” i say and they resume. Sharp at four, “ chai, naste ka waqt ho gaya.” Now my temperature soaring, tears welled up my eyes. “ chai, nasta adhe ghante ke baad milega.” Yet i have not bathed nor have eaten properly, just entertaining and attending them.  After a while at 5:00 they come and say “ abhi, aaj ka din poora, phir kal aayenge.” And they leave
So tomorrow again… same turmoil! I have started to hate Diwali saaf safai and after that crackers se cash ki safai. 
Ohh god!! No diwali again please!!

I don’t know whether they are the ones helping me or I ? 🤔

Monday 10 May 2021

Grip On Breathe


 I can’t even say

I have left hope aside

Here we are facing dark days

Never ending death rates

Escalating with speed

Prayers being unheard

Pleas falling on deaf hearts


Neglected patients 

Dying outside hospitals

Gasping for breathe  

the ones whose hope fluttering

Demanding lungs 

For supply of O2 


Relatives, kids, women, men

Every one’s eyes moistens

Wailing, howling cursing,


Unstoppable tears..

To fall..

Throughout their lives

Will miss their loved ones 

For their whole life

Will be left alone with memories


Fragrance of different flowers

Will remind days of togetherness 

Those fresh fragrances

Will be  dried with the seasons

Merged with fragrance of incenses

Will  burn to revive fragrances of golden days


Imagination growing strong

From photo frames 

In different sizes

Will be hanging on the walls

Wails will  stop

Coz no one will hear or ignore

Still! Universe will stay guilt free


No one will  feel pain

Hearts will suffer blocks

From every house one will hear

Almost similar story 

of sufferings and deaths

So hearts will then turn heartless


One more straw left to burden

For additional grievances

is the count of deaths

To fill the forms for death certificates

And the name appearing

In register

collecting statistics of deaths

And the names of loved ones

Will Change into number

No name will be left

Left behind will be ID number


Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Kalpana’s imagination

Sunday 9 May 2021

Obsession

She cannot be noticed

In a dark rainy night

Has the rain swallowed her

flowed down in ocean with fear

Fear of lightning or the dawn next

If she be seen 

apocalypse can strike

She was flowed in depth on bed

But the ocean feared her strength

She was the one with a ferocious power

Can strike an ocean and break its peace

Where she should be wrecked?

In the remnants of desires!!

A goddess of desire 

Hidden in the minds

Wrecked, past,  ruined and shattered


After shatter


Nowhere wss her land

Nowhere was her beauty

Still a desired temptation

An obsession of possession 

She ruled minds, played games

Multiplication in addition

Desires constructed throne

She was the accumlated greed

A goddess of desires

Made to rule; “A land of greed”


Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Kalpana’s imagination

Friday 30 April 2021

To My Heart

Day:30
#napowrimo2021 #GloPoWriMo2021

To My Heart

Jump in 
through two windows 
One right one left!!
I don’t know-
How you will do it?
But you have to do 
If you want to reach 
To the land of my heart

Another way is-
Say “love you”
Until i get sic of it
Then, maybe, 
i run away from you
Far off, 
to the land unknown
May be, to the land 
Where i shall tie a knot 
for the new beginning 

Let the tears flow
In the direction of;
A land of love
Settle there forever
And my heart stays wet
Till last breath of my soul

Kalpana Shah
Kalpana's Poems & Writings
Kalpana’s imagination

From Bread to Heart

From the window


A square in a bread

Eaten by mouse

I look through it

A stomach of it


Through a bread

I see a creature 

as a male

Because the saying goes

“To enter into man’s heart

Is through his stomach”

And a mouse,  i despise

They are the pics of mouse,i love


I teach my children 

M for “Mouse” 

M for “Man”

Here, i draw this analogy


I can see through 

window of bread

Those two eyes

Hungry or greedy

I don’t know 

But those eyes made me 

Let go off that piece

To forgive that small mouse


I can see in his heart

That piece of bread

Reached in his heart

That’s why, i see him hovering

often around my kitchen

Otherwise for him 

food is available everywhere


it’s my big heart

And his loving heart

Kept on building windows

In the loaf of bread

Window connecting

heart to heart


Kalpana’s imagination 


Wednesday 28 April 2021

Meaningless Dragging

Day :28

#Napowrimo2021

#Glopowrimo2021


Meaningless


Beginning till end

Tell me, “ what have you gained?”

It’s not so worth to drag on this way

Do you know or ask me the reason -why?


Laugh it off on my foolishness

And you be wise to rise!

But i will laugh till the begining to the end

Do you know the reason - why?


Above us, in the sky

You will rise very high

Then one day 

you will exhaust to be back on the ground


Your baggage on the soil

The vulture from high

Or the scavengers on site

Come and steal your bag with delight

To find nothing useful in it

They will throw you back

On the place where you laid


Passerbys, will stop for a moment and pass 

You will look at the sky

But find your soul fly

You will understand the meaning

Of my genuineness in my laugh


Sunday 25 April 2021

Who Cares!


 !The poem you write can be for an occasion in the past or the future, one important to you and your family (a wedding, a birth) or for an occasion in the public eye (the Olympics, perhaps?).



Day : 25

#Napowrimo2021

#Glopowrimo2021


Who Cares!!


Within political boundaries

We bound ourselves  to serve humanity

Forgetting to serve beyond boundaries


Is it ignorance,

Or i don't care attitude,

Or by default indifferent?


Our thoughts: They have their laws

Justice is taken care off.

However, blindfolded it may be..


Amidst varied religions within boundaries

Forgotten is the religion of humanity.

For once, lift our eyes beyond boundaries


Tyranny, injustice, blood bath, brutality

All beyond boundaries happen.. not here

We, chill! unconcerned!! happy souls!!


Kalpana’s imagination 

Resilience in your Conquest

  This is the boldest poem i wrote till now

I don’t know, how with a flow my fingers flowed to fill a screen

 

Resilience In Your Conquest


I stick to you 

No lesser than glue

Still you doubt me

My fidelity,

you put on test!!

You are not Ram 

Or i Sita!


We are living in an era

Where we don’t wait 

For check mate

We make love and break

No gender discrimination needed

Equality everywhere

It has to be no lose-win 

It has to be our win-win

Then why fidelity 

Expected from me?

Ohh, bcoz ..

i have disrobed myself

Not as Draupadi;

Dragged with her hair by dushyant

It was a blow to your ego

Bcoz it was not a man to drag me

I did on my own,

I surprised you

By wearing torn ripped jeans

Or by showing my cleavage 

Or by wearing tees with tits empowering your mind

from your perspective

So be it!!


You were not the life giver, alone

It was a woman along -consummated!


For nine months 

270 days 

she died and lived,

In her womb 

Her child breathed

And that were you “A MAN”

Your sister - “A WOMAN”

And your patner - “A WOMAN”

So why is woman questioned?

Or abused, beat, molested, raped

My vagina may be a jewel for you

But for me it is just as your penis

Nothing less nothing more

Though my ancestors glorified it

And taught me to feel guilty 

When it’s been ripped before marriage

Why is a marriage, a license for fidelity?

After marriage also i can infidel

So no need for me to be perfect

No need for me to display my fidelity for you


What if i am lying?

Will you hang me, lynch me?

Answer Me...

I ask... what about you??


Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Kalpana’s imagination

Like Unlike

Day 24

#Napowrimo2021 #Glopwrimo2021

     


Drinking milk from the wide bowl

As my children does, forgetting world

-Remembering hunger

She cries softly sometimes loud

Her entering inside my gate as soon as they are opened

I pity her though ignoring her

I am irked because she is not so pleasant

It is me who dislikes dogs and cats 

Their softness curl around me, hurts me 

I know it’s mean to dislike 

but there is no reason for me 

to like them either!!


Kalpana’s imagination 

Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Kalpana Shah

Thursday 22 April 2021

Earth in Danger

   

Day 20

#napowrimo2021 #glopowrimo2021


Rest for the best

It’s our test

Don’t give up hope!

We have power to cope!


Earth in danger

Enemy- is a stranger

Strange is his attacks

Whips of death, it cracks


In thousands they multiply

In silence they make us cry

Doctors and researchers 

Confused health ministers


Round the clock on duty

Fights a battle bravely


Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Kalpana’s imagination


 Day :4 

#NaPoWriMo2021  #GloPoWriMo2021

Prompt: @SpaceLiminalspacebot


It’s about entering into other room; a few steps away, dragged out my earned prestige in my working space


               Endless Steps


Heart racing, uncountable beats

Anxiety heightens, 

feeling of escape growing strong

Non stop thoughts, Nagging brain

It hammered where it did hurt hard


From one room to another

Hardly few steps away

I died many times with fear

 Until i reached his room


Nobody mattered to me

Fear gripped my stomach

It was a transit from this day onwards


On every step i could hear his heavy voice 

“ You are sacked “ 

I fell from top 

On the ground i stand


Kalpana’s imagination 


 Day 10 

#napowrimo2021 #GloPoWriMo 2021


From One Decade to Another


Who cares! 

Whether i own one or not

Those brands, were once,

pride of my wardrobe

Those jeans and short tees

Of “ Levis” and “Wranglers

In those days costed in thousands


After a decade or two

I see a change of not just my wardrobe

But interior of my room

Once where you...

Held my hands and promised

Your love for me forever


Those were the days 

Of flaunting owner’s pride

I now bid adieu , 

For sake of you, my love

I changed my taste,

Once those branded

Now these sarees draped gracefully


Faded and worn out decade i live


Kalpana’s imagination 


Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Nostalgic about Ambassador

Day :22

#napowrimo2021 #GloPoWriMo2021


Nostalgic about Ambassador


A car of yesteryears

Maybe around 1972

An ambassador, a bulky car

We had owned with pride

Pride because of its wide figure

Secondly, an official car of every minister

With beacon on top like a crown

Flashing red as it passed

All the streets went empty

With traffic policemen marking salutations

Its sound made heads turn around

And awed struck, looking at it


Well! That was minister’s car

Coming to our car- A modest one

Blue color, like gigantic ocean

Moved smoothly, swiftly 

On rumpy jumpy roads


Windows rolled down

We all sat squeezing each other

Fighting for whatever space we found

When one moved a single part of her body

With dicky ( no slang intended) rear space to put baggages

In it dumped eatables, chairs, mattresses, blankets and water jug

We all use to go to Drive-in theatre


Ahh! Those were the days 

In little, there was a fun 

Our childhood belonged there

In that modest Ambassador

One of the best car of childhood


Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Kalpana Shah

Kalpana’s imagination

Tuesday 20 April 2021

Ambigious Invaders

 Day 20

#napowrimo2021 #glopowrimo2021


Rest for the best

It’s our test

Don’t give up hope!

We have power to cope!


Earth in danger

Enemy- is a stranger

Strange is his attacks

Whips of death, it cracks


In thousands they multiply

In silence they make us cry

Doctors and researchers 

Confused health ministers


Round the clock on duty

Fights a battle bravely


Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Kalpana’s imagination

Bubble Construction


Day : 18

#Napowrimo2021 #glopowrimo2021


Forgotten are the days of rememberance

I have nothing to remember

Just to forget i have memories


Nowhere i am surrounded

Since universe took birth

Nothing is rare about it

Whatever has to happen happens

 Noone can change the order of omniscient 

Omnipresent is present can be an illusuion


An illusionary bubble watched by unknown 

Seems to react in the way of action 

Action done cannot U-turn or undone

So Beware!! We are the victims of actions 


A ball you throw will be judged by a judge 

Enhance the progress of actions to construct 

A bubble of your zonal comforts don’t be upset 

A content of your judgment and a buble of your everyday content 


Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Kalpana’s imagination

Friday 16 April 2021

Autism

Day:16

#NaPoWriMo2021

#GloPoWriMo2021


Autism


Here i am wondering

These children dancing

Those jokers laughing

Mothers weeping 

Secertly enjoying

Their children dancing

Clapping and singing

°

Their hindered growth

Their song sings truth

Truth of their tales

Nobody to hear their wails

They are the poor souls

God’s old cold bold fouls

Forgiving humans

Forgetting men

Children of lesser god

Living in a superficial world🌍 


Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Kalpana's imagination 

Kalpana Shah

Hell of “Shit”

Day 15

#Napowrimo2021 #Glopowrimo2021


Hell of ‘Shit”


It was never an inspiration

It was never an inspiration

Or any aspiration to be like them

Somehow we do pick up traits by default

They were there

With us for 24 hours

And those hours

Divided into 8 members

Now i wonder, how did they do!!

Still there was no lines of frowns

In meagre income we were happy 

In fights we found hidden love


Memories are many to cherish with my parents

But one word of my father

That he wanted me to forget

But life long strolled with me - “Shit” 

Ohh no!! That shit word stuck to me 

I tried to scrub he tried to scrub

With lots of efforts, nothing worked

And my tongue always spills “ shit” when things around me is “shitty”

Niether shit changes 

Nor my foul lose tongue

It’s trendy to spill “shit”

Slang of west; “Shit!” Has spoilt us


Kalpana’s imagination 

Kalpana’s Poems & Writings

Wednesday 14 April 2021

Kalpana Means Imagination

 Our reading for the day is is another live event, which will take place tomorrow, April 15 at 7:30 p.m. eastern daylight time. Poet Hanif Abdurraqib will read live online from his 2019 book, A Fortune for Your Disaster.


And last but not least, our (optional) prompt for the day. Today, I’d like to challenge you to write a poem that delves into the meaning of your first or last name


Day 14 

#Napowrimo2021 #Glopowrimo2021


Kalpana means Imagination 


My name-very common

Kalpana-imagination 

Never did my parents guessed

I will fly in imagination


I will shine bright

Walk on Moon

Slip in sealed envelope

And travel into postman’s bag

In all corners of the world

In every corner of the home

I will open up to adorn beauty of images

Images in Imagination


No boundary, no curb on freedom

I can dance on streets crowded

I can drive in sky in my car

I can sit anytime on anybody’s head

Last but not least, 

i can reign anybody’s and everybody’s heart


I can break every and any heart

Then burn pages with ink from my eyes

With stroke of pen i can make hearts bleed

But alas!! All just in my name

Imagination-surrounded with harsh realism

Living half in realism and half in Imagination


Kalpana’s imagination 








Tuesday 13 April 2021

Tears of Joy

Day 13 prompt

#napowrimo2021 #glopowrimo2021


      Tears of Joy

Once a refugee shouldn’t be refugee forever

Here he migrates to his country

Provided to him is his nationality Of the country he belonged with pride 


For years, he had flown tears

Made our soil fertile till his dried

Our rivers were full and crops in abundance

We shared with them as we do with our brothers


They were in thousands with uncertainity

Lived a life of nomads 

Homeless, still home everywhere 

He lived temporarily on jobs odd

Feeding stomach of his family

He tried to cover his roof with tarpaulins 

But he had to make a roof of ordinary blue plastic to save himself and his family from rain


No voice can be louder than voice of hunger

He can go to any extend to stop that voice

He fed his stomach with meagre food


Here comes our government

Signed an agreement

To send all refugees home 

With due respect 

They are welcomed back 

Offered a job to all

After a long will tears welled up in their eyes

This time those tears will be “ tears of joy.”


Kalpana’s imagination 

Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Monday 12 April 2021

Present; A threshold

Day 12 prompt
#Napowrimo2021 #GloPoWriMo2021

Present; A threshold 

It’s a war 
War between
Future and past
Where present has “no say”
It quietly bows to both
Trying to mediate 
Doesn’t work

War in mind
Between future and past
Goes on and on 
Past is an interface 
In the form of history

Present ruining history
Future constructing history
On the site of remnants 
Left overs are reminders
Of the division taken place
Taking place and will take place

Kalpana's Poems & Writings
Kalpana’s imagination

Sunday 11 April 2021

Two Letters of Settlement

 Day 11, 

#Napowrimo 2021 #Glopowrimo 2021


Dear Civilians,

Social distancing is the need of an hour

Mask is mandatory to save yourself

Avoid leaving house  without  reason

Washing hands often or sanitising them

These are the simple rules to follow

Then how come  you forget to follow


Is your family people’s life not vsluable?

You lnow the numbers of people dying!!

Why not go and vaccinate yourself?

You will be saving many lives

Don’t misguide people 

by your misguided behaviour

So be a good children of a Nation

Take care of yourself and others

Life is very precious!!


Yours affectionately,

Common Man


—————————————————————


Dear Common Man,


Are you a police or a politician?

Who gave you rights to punish us?

It’s my life, it’s my choice!!

Don’t ruin my joy

Ahh! Who said there is Corona around!

Hey, wait a moment!!

Are you a Netas,

One who gives long speeches 

At an opportunity you get to hold mic?

They are the ones collecting crowd

Gathering crowd for rallies and marches

Are they not  responsible for spreading?


Well! I am worried for my family, my society 

I want to  save my country

Not just corona but manny othe social evils 

My country men are dying 

for no reason  of their doings 

Nobody cares for them then why should I!


I am not the only one 

There are mass who don’t wear mask

No social distancing rules for them

Why one is punished and other moving scot free? 

So, please don’t bother me and let me enjoy!


Yours Sincerely

Group of Civilians


Task of Yama

Day: 9 

#Napowrimo 2021 #Glopowrimo 2021


Task of Yama


Sitting on top

Wakes early 

Revolves chair

Recites a prayer

A prayer to god

Well!!

Lord Yama praying to another god

To help, finish a task, monotonous


Starts with solomon

Then with jackson

Later afternoon

With Madison

Evening with Edison


Begins with accounting

Finishes till Madison

Till midnight

Task left imcomplete

He fails to do task

And that Edison is saved

In incomplete task of Yama

Edison is granted 10 more years to live

He looks at Edison dancing and he penalised 


One Decade to Another

 Day 10 

#napowrimo2021 #GloPoWriMo 2021


From One Decade to Another


Who cares! 

Whether i own one or not

Those brands, were once,

pride of my wardrobe

Those jeans and short tees

Of “ Levis” and “Wranglers

In those days costed in thousands


After a decade or two

I see a change of not just my wardrobe

But interior of my room

Once where you...

Held my hands and promised

Your love for me forever


Those were the days 

Of flaunting owner’s pride

I now bid adieu , 

For sake of you, my love

I changed my taste,

Once those branded

Now these sarees draped gracefully


Faded and worn out decade i live


Kalpana’s imagination 


Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Thursday 8 April 2021

Indebted

 Day : 8,

#NaPoWriMo2021

#Glopowrimo2021

               

              Indebted


He yelled at me to count my blessings

Otherwise i was the child unlucky

Because on the day i was born

That day occured an earthquake

Hitting hard on my heart

Because of me, my mom died 

In the month of january, 

When at first i did cry 


He went on and on

Day in and day out

Hallucinating his words 

on and on


He died but left his ill fated words behind

I as a child ran to earn

For me to remember to live in giilt


He showed me how in his debt i should live

That everyday i need to apologize him and beg forgiveness

Now with my life 

i pay him his debt


kalpana’s imagination 

Kalpana's Poems & Writings


Wednesday 7 April 2021

Shadorma Poems

 #Napowrimo2021 #Glopowrimo 2021


Prompt 7 



A Shadorma poem which consists of 6 lines and syllable with a combination of 3/5/3/3/7/5




I feel love

In your eyes i see

A passion

Strongly grow

Desire stirs emotion

Setting heart on fire


Kalpana’s imagination





Seeking  God!

“ Which way will you go?”

Saint asked 

He answered

I travelled  through the world

I left out my being


Kalpana’s imagination

Tuesday 6 April 2021

Poverty of Sunshine

Day 6: #Napowrimo 2021. #Glopowrimo 2021

In the Darkness of the night : Novel, Conspirator


Poverty of Sunshine


Cold arrived to wrap

Her very tiny world

In the black hole

Suffered sunshine


No place to hide

No place did she find

She wept all night

Shivering beneath

A sheet of cold fright


Dark grew darker

Amidst the night

She lost the fight

In her darkness

She finds slumber

Forever... forever!!


Kalpana’s imagination 

Kalpana's Poems & Writings

Monday 5 April 2021

Bleak Sight

Day 5

#Napowrimo2021 #Glopowrimo2021

A challenging prompt: to find a poem, and then write a new poem that has the shape of the original so my poem is based on Emily Dickinson 

~ "Time feels so vast that were it not" -Emily 

Dickinson


Through the window, a bleak sight

For the time being...

I watch a  dance of death

End of the day , a fearful sleep


Till my eyes reach, it’s suffering

Begging for forgiveness

For the sins of world

On the  day of Easter 



Through the window, a blind sight


Kalpana’s imagination 

My Silence Voices

My silence too has a voice

Killing me whenever i feel it

As though, i am responsible for my silence


How to let it know,  how much do i want to lend a sound!

I want to listen what it desires to say

Somewhere within me 

i am apprehensive about my silence

It carries many dark secrets within its heart

A powerful sound will world hear

If it finds a voice

A beauty at present can turn into some ugly disfigured truth

Reopening resurfacing 

a darkness of tunnel in vivid bright lights


A distraction killing fun, bringing world to an halt

A time comes to standstill

A madness showing up on time with silence

A silence oblivious of itself sticks to promise it made

Never to utter... Never to utter

Its tongue has been slayed

Silence will never show its ugly figure

It will bear unfathomable pain 

To the extent of its death

Till the silence gives away to voice

And thus silence lay dead on the street of love

Love dead with silence and nothing besides silence


Kalpana's imagination

Sunday 4 April 2021

Endless Steps

 Day :4 

#NaPoWriMo2021  #GloPoWriMo2021

Prompt: @SpaceLiminalspacebot


It’s about entering into other room; a few steps away, dragged out my earned prestige in my working space


               Endless Steps


Heart racing, uncountable beats

Anxiety heightens, 

feeling of escape growing strong

Non stop thoughts, Nagging brain

It hammered where it did hurt hard


From one room to another

Hardly few steps away

I died many times with fear

 Until i reached his room


Nobody mattered to me

Fear gripped my stomach

It was a transit from this day onwards


On every step i could hear his heavy voice 


“ You are sacked “ 

I fell from top 

On the ground i stand


Kalpana’s imagination 


Saturday 3 April 2021

#Napowrimo #Glopowrimo 2021 - It was a dream

Day :3 Promt: Personal Universal Deck




                   It was a dream


I thought she will arrive on time with delicacies made to cater my dream. She arrived like a slacker. I made a quilt fluffy, with wavy golden four sided border. She danced for few minutes on the quilt, soon after her arrival.  It made my lids dance with joy. As i saw her arrive.My lips protruded to kiss the star.My beloved dream settles in sleep to dream of romantic rendezvous.Adorning me with his arms around me, locked his lips with mine. It was my beauty he drank in delight. A dark night played soft music whole night for us to drink love out of its goblet. My eyes wore twinkle of stars, longing for never to end dream of my sleep and the night. It was a dream i wanted to pluck and fix in my life. A deck i want to prepare forever.

Kalpana’s imagination 

Friday 2 April 2021

Imprudent Consideration

 


Tuesday, 2 July 2013

Imprudent Consideration

                                                      
                                           
                     Kumar and Vidhi were shocked at the news their daughter has exploded. Astonish with mouth wide open. “Do you know what you are saying? Have you gone crazy?” said Vidhi heatedly to her daughter Raima. “No mother I am serious. I cannot live without Suruchi. I love her and want to stay with her as it is we cannot legally marry each other. Her parents want her to get married, they are searching a suitable match for her and I don’t want her to marry anyone else.” Cries Raima. Looking at tears in her eyes Kumar’s heart skipped a beat. She was their only daughter though Vidhi wanted another child but he put his foot down. He was very happy with his daughter. They loved her and pampered her so much that single tear in her eyes would make them sleepless. Vidhi was still strict towards her she did not believe in spoiling her child that somebody points a finger at her and brings a bad name for the family. “You are not going to do any such nonsense. You are not old enough to think of entertain these stupid ideas in your mind.” Said Vidhi irritated at a stupid idea her daughter is carrying.”  “Mother, why don’t you understand? We both want to stay together. Suruchi is old enough to take care of me. she has been doing this till now. Whenever I am alone or in difficulty she is always there to stand by me. She can read my thoughts before my saying anything.” Said Raima, tears welled up in her eyes. “Do Suruchi’s parents know about it?” Ask Kumar “no, they don’t know and if they do they will not approve, you know how conservative they are. Suruchi says we both can stay together life long.  Mother if you don’t agree we will elope were nobody can find us.” Said Raima. “Then what was the need for you to tell us.” Said Vidhi “mother, I know that you both love me a lot. I didn’t want to hide anything from you and I am sure you will accept our relationship. You are different from other parents – very modern. I have faith in you. I too don’t want  to let you down I know you too love me and second thing I know you will not refuse me my happiness.” Said Raima pleadingly. Vidhi looks at her angrily and says in firm voice “stop your nonsense and go to your room I don’t want any arguments.” Raima cries and rushes towards her room.
      
            “This girl is impossible! Immature!” said Vidhi while alone with Kumar in their room. “I had told you long back remember when Raima was three to have another issue so that Raima doesn’t feel alone. Her lonesomeness is the culprit of her imprudence Perhaps… perhaps, may be that Suruchi must be persuading her. She ought to understand she is elder to Raima.” Said Vidhi infuriated. Kumar is diffidently silent because he was in no mood to argue. As it is she is always one up than him in arguments especially on this issue.

              Next day Raima explodes “papa, yesterday night I spoke to Suruchi she said after a month she will go to delhi to see a boy. Her parents are almost ready they have seen the guy and liked him. They are waiting for Suruchi’s response and she is waiting for my approval. I want you to give me permission then she will let her parents know about our relationship, I have given her a month’s time. Yeah and before that if you disclosed anything to Suruchi’s parents then watch…!” her parents were shocked in disbelief how can their loving daughter talk like this to them. Vidhi’s eyes filled with tears, lost at words, anger over clouding her mind since morning she could not concentrate anywhere. Raima’s words were recurring in her mind and thinking about unusual and absurd ideas to bring her daughter back to her senses. 
             
           Kumar goes to the office but before that he goes to his doctor for his regular checkups. In doctor’s chamber doctor examines him then looking at him he says “is everything fine with you, you look much tensed up your blood pressure too is very high, hadn’t you taken your medicines?” Kumar says, “I have been taking medicines regularly.” “What’s the matter? You come to me everytime but I have never seen you so upset. Tell me, I will do as much as possible to help you. You are my good friend.” Silent, not sure whether to disclose his daughter’s obstinate, dim-witted thoughts. Slowly he confides to Dr. Harsh Verma, close friend of his. Since he came to this city it was dr. Harsh Verma who helped him find a flat to live then it was Harsh’s party were he met his wife Vidhi. 
       
             After listening to Kumar for a moment Harsh remained silent then after a while he told Kumar slowly “it is impossible to believe Raima to have such ideas. She is quiet naïve and fool to entertain crazy thoughts or perhaps may be, being alone she must have found a soul mate in her friend. She requires help because this case is not natural, if not prevented it may lead to devastation of her life. She should be stopped and at present she needs is your support and for heaven sake don’t reprimand or criticize her not even against her friend because it will make the matter worse she will be more and more attracted towards her friend. we will have to patiently handle this matter and try as much as possible for one of you to stay at home with her, keep check on her to see that she doesn’t meet Suruchi often. Meanwhile I shall try to do something. Whenever she comes out with that topic anyhow take no notice of it. Don’t unnecessarily argue with her. it will make her more revolting It’s better to stay happily and make her feel loved.”  “Well but I am frightened this girl doesn’t take any hasty decision.” Said kumar. “She will not behave rashly because if she wanted she would have had done without revealing to you but in no way she wants to offend you and Vidhi.” Said harsh to console Kumar. “You are lucky enough to get an obedient daughter.”  Kumar is thankful to Harsh to help him unburden his problem. In this hour he wanted to speak to Harsh. “I will tell Vidhi to take a leave from her job.” saying this he takes a leave.
        
              After a week while Kumar, Vidhi and Raima were having their breakfast a door bell rings Raima opens the door, “Is it Mr. Kumar Kher’s residence.” Asked a man standing on the door. “Yeah, wait a minute I shall call him. May I know your name please? At that moment Kumar reaches the door, “It’s me, Mr. Kumar Kher.” “I am Nitin Gupta from Pune. This is my appointment letter I received from your company.” Said a tall man with slight dark complexion, athlete body, wearing a dark blue shirt and beige colour trousers that enhanced his personality. “Right, I suppose we were to meet in an office at eleven.” “I have reached here today morning and am searching for a decent place to stay. You know here in Mumbai it is very difficult to find good comfortable accommodation.” “Hesitantly, sir can you please help me anyway?” Said the young man standing on the door. Thinking for a moment Kumar says, “Oh yes why not. You can stay here at my residence till your internship there is a guest room upstairs. You can put your stay there;” Kumar calls the servant to carry the luggage upstairs.
           
               After an hour Nitin comes down he greets everybody on the table Kumar introduces him to Vidhi and Raima. “Meet new intern of our company. He is from Pune my friend’s son. He has completed his graduation in electrical engineering. It’s a six months training course.” Raima and Vidhi greet him. They both observe Nitin has good features, very well mannered and soft spoken person. “Come and have your breakfast.” Says Kumar. Nitin joins them Vidhi ask him about his family and education. In between Raima also ask him many things. As days pass Nitin gets so involved with their family that he completely forgets that he is an outsider. He appreciates the nature of all the three members and even they too felt the same about Nitin. They found him very even-tempered unpretentious and candid that they were impressed by him. Raima initially was reluctant and exchanged few words with him but soon she too started liking him. Slowly they became good friends. In between Suruchi did make calls they both spoke but hearing the cold response and Raima’s abruptly cutting the phone she grows suspicious, “ Raima, what are you doing today evening let’s go out on the beach for  a stroll and have dinner out.” She asked her. “Today evening I am going out with Nitin.” “Who Nitin?” asked Suruchi not liking to hear other guys name from Raima. “Oh, very stupid of me. Sorry I just forgot to tell you about this guy Nitin who has come here from Pune working as an intern with papa. Nice guy, very simple and intelligent. In general knowledge he cannot be beaten he is amazing.” “Is he staying at your place?” ask Suruchi. “Yeah, and we both have become good friends you know Suruchi he has a good sense of humour and he is very jovial by nature and…” Suruchi interrupts,” it’s ok Raima, I am not interested in what he is and it will be better you too stay away from him. These boys are all same he will make you fall for him and leave you for crying. Now tell me are you coming out.” said Suruchi with jealousy. “Hey lets do one thing I will invite Nitin with us too. In this way he will not be left alone as it is he has nothing to do in evening.” “Ok, let him join us.” Seeing Raima’s enthusiasm and ingenuousness she agrees. “Well then, see you in evening on beach at eight o’clock.” 
              
                  In evening three of them walked on the beach and went to the restaurant in that time it was Raima and Nitin doing most of the talking and Suruchi was quiet and irritated at Raima taking too much interest in Nitin and whenever she spoke she either taunted or underestimated every word of Raima. She was just disinterested talking to Nitin, she did not like Raima’s too much liking for Nitin. She felt jealous when she found Raima looking at Nitin. It was not hidden from her the twinkle of her eyes as she looked at Nitin. She was feeling left alone though both of them wanted her to get involve in the conversation too. Still she felt out of place and was very angry with Raima. Later on after dinner back home Suruchi called Raima she was all blown up. No sooner did Raima picked up the phone she fretted and fumed, “how can you do this to me, am I an ignorant, how you’ll dare humiliate me, you call me for dinner and both of you get involve with your own jokes, both of you were making fun of me…” interrupts Raima, “no way Suruchi you are misinterpreting us. It was all casual and general talks we did not mean to hurt you. You are my best friend, always fought with others for you and even thinking of staying with you then how you got this idea, I am upset and hurt. Nitin is just the same as you are and he is our guest.” “C’mon now, don’t give excuses, I know you both are in love and you are not agreeing that. I saw the spark in your eyes whenever you looked at Nitin.” Said Suruchi with anger and jealousy. “You are jealous… just because you are jealous you can’t insult me. I am not going to take more and I don’t like you speaking about Nitin too. He belongs to a good family and is very genius…and forget about love I have never thought about it.” “…so again you started praising him. Why are you trying to protect him? Who is he to you?” Ask Suruchi. “Nothing much, he is my good friend as you.” “Just friend, am I your just good friend! You were ready to elope with me. You wanted to marry me. I can get many good eligible boys to marry but it was your feelings that I cared most. I don’t want to hurt you so I thought about staying with you. I was obliging you but I did not know you will dump me.” said Suruchi angrily. “Wait, wait a minute! What do you mean obliging! We both care for each other does not mean I cannot do whatever I like. You love me don’t mean you can dictate me, who are you to decide with whom I must talk and what I must do. You have been doing since we became good friends and I have never mentioned that your dominating nature gets on my nerves. I can’t stay with you.” said Raima angrily. “I know who is messing everything. Either you choose him or me.” And she just bangs the phone down. Raima could not control the flow of tears. She’s all alone in the room furious with Suruchi’s behaviour. She is baffled she couldn’t understand the change of Suruchi’s attitude. Suruchi has always been sweet to her, very caring, cheerful but today she couldn’t believe?
     
                 Next morning Raima’s mother looking at Raima, “what’s the matter, why are your eyes swollen? What’s wrong… it seems you cried whole night?” “No nothing much… and again her eyes filled with tears. “ Kumar comes near Raima puts his arms around her, looks lovingly at her and consoles her, “did Nitin say anything to you?” Raima nods. After lots of cajoling Raima speaks, tells everything about the conversation with Suruchi. Kumar and Raima looks at each other in their hearts they are greatly relieved and happy as though a stone upon their heart have been lifted. Kumar pauses for a moment does not speak he does not want to miss this opportunity now he feels the time has come to put some sense in Raima’s head just at that moment Nitin enters the room and looks at Raima and greets her, “hello good morning! Hey I guess for you morning is not great enough. You look as though you hadn’t slept whole night.” Raima doesn’t speak and just runs in her room. Kumar discloses everything about Suruchi and Raima. Nitin listens silently not responding after a while he says,” don’t worry sir Raima is very gullible and childish she only needs is  a good companion who can give her love and take care of her she is pampered  lot too. Everything will fall in right place only thing we can do now is to in any case prevent Raima meeting Suruchi because she can again be enticed by her. Vidhi pleads to Nitin, “now that you are here you can give her company she has started trusting you. It is you who can help her to come out of the mess and she too listens to whatever you say, within few days you have become part of our family.” Says Vidhi. “Well aunty, I will try.” says Nitin. 
     
                   Suruchi and Raima, they both wait for each others call but both are unwilling to make a first move. One is full of ego and another with resentment and Nitin slowly tries to make Raima happy with his talks and taking her out for movies and dinners. Initially Raima remained sad and accepted Nitin’s proposal of going out defiantly but then it was impossible to refuse Nitin. Nitin was in no mood of give up easily anyhow he would convince Raima to come out with him slowly she would get engrossed in his talk forgetting all her infatuation and anger towards Suruchi. She would wait Nitin to return from office and go out for long walks on beach. After few days in a restaurant after finishing the dinner as they were leaving. Suddenly Raima greets a couple sitting in on the table in the left corner near the entrance “hello aunty-uncle, how are you‘ll?” They too smiles and responds, “Hello dear, seeing you after long time. After Suruchi left, you have not at all called or visited our house…hmm! I can see you busy nowadays.” Winking at Raima Mrs. Bhatt says and smiles mischievously. “No aunty, meet my friend Nitin working as intern at papa’s office and aunty how is Suruchi and where’s she gone?” Mr. Bhatt replies, “Why you don’t know she has gone to visit her aunt who lives in Delhi. Her aunt has found a suitable match for her and she has approved the boy. She will be staying there for few days. Why, you don’t know she didn’t tell you. Oh perhaps, she might be thinking to give you a surprise?” Raima smiles and congratulates them and says, “yeah I was busy and…” “Oh, so again you two fought. When will you two grow up?” Says Mrs. Bhatt and smiles. Raima doesn’t reply. “Ok aunty, now we shall leave, we are in hurry.” Says Raima to avoid further investigation from Mrs. Bhatt and they both leave. 
             On the way, “… so she was the one to stay with you and marry you.” Says Nitin laughingly to Raima. “She left you in between, yeah but one thing is sure I won’t leave you in between if you want I can stay and take care of you life long unless you are genuinely lesbian.” Nitin says looking at Raima and continues. “Yeah Raima after meeting you I feel it will be very difficult for me to leave you. I am in love with you, your innocence and your beauty have. I don’t know what you think about me but I’m sure I can wait for your answer you can take your own time. After a week my training will finish and I will have to go back to Pune.” Raima is stunned and speechless, she is confused and her brains went numbed not knowing how to react to Nitin’s proclamation of love to her. Reaching at home Raima couldn’t sleep thinking about Nitin and his words her whole body quivering she felt a new feeling, a sense of belonging one who loves her and accepted her, she had never ever felt for Suruchi or any other boy though she was well known for her reserved outlook and superciliousness.
        

             Next day, returning home Nitin finds raima and her parents sitting in a drawing room sullenly His heart skips a beat feeling uneasy with all mix feelings but most important worry was Raima’s answer to his love hoping and praying that she accepts it. Whole night he wasn’t able to sleep thinking about Raima’s answer. He himself did not know when and how he fell in love with her. Now when he knew he has to leave he felt it right to propose her about his feelings. Soon he walks towards a drawing room finds everybody sitting silently, deep in his heart he was praying for his life Raima to accept his love. Kumar all of a sudden burst into a laugh. Vidhi says to Kumar, “oh no! You spoilt the whole fun. Look at his face it looks as if he will cry you should have waited more.” “Sorry, but I couldn't take it any more anyway Nitin yesterday when you proposed Raima she immediately did not answer because she wanted to take our permission first.” Now it was Nitin’s turn to smile he looks at Raima, as their eyes meet she blushes. Nitin wanted to hold Raima in his arms at that moment. For once he was speechless but he looks at Kumar and they both show the thumb a sign of victory. Vidhi and Raima saw the gesture and ask them. Kumar narrates the conversation with Dr Harsh Verma and next day Dr Harsh comes with the proposal of his brother’s son Nitin and then you two know all .Raima says, “So it was all planned and suppose I refuse now what will you’ll do?” “Can you?” ask Nitin smilingly knowing the answer, “unless Kumar uncle and Vidhi aunty wants, so what say aunty.” Vidhi looks at Raima and understands she pulls her daughter towards her and hugs her